Monday, May 21, 2012

How fast can she run in those stilettos, anyway?

So, let's just jump right into this, with no explanation for having not written in months and, before that, years.

Alrighty then; now that that's behind us....

We have some wildlife here in our neighborhood, which we moved to late last year.  This is to be expected, as we live near a "marsh" (I like to refer to our street as "Swampview Terrace") and a nature/wildlife preserve.

Various neighbors I've met, completely independently of each other, have corroborated stories of a family of red foxes (the wildlife kind, not the "I'm-Comin'-Elizabeth!" kind); at least one raccoon; the usual ornithological suspects -- blue jays, robins, orioles, and possibly several other Major League Baseball teams, and with an added bonus of what appears to be a married Bald Eagle couple who live high in a really tall tree around the corner; plus, garden (garter? what's the difference?) snakes; other lawn critters (grubs and snails and such); etc.

As of two weeks ago, two different sets of neighbors have told me that we have a bobcat in the neighborhood.

Today, I learned of a coyote.

Being a native of Brooklyn, where our wildlife ranged from simple rodents (of the mouse/rat variety) to simple pigeons (which is to say, flying rodents) to the occasional full-grown vagrant, this news has not gone over well with me. Whereas I was more than a little spooked, up until recently, by the prospect of everything from aerial attack (moths) to light ground combat (toads) when I take the Franks out at night, I am now wholly and irrationally terrified of leaving this house even during the day, to say nothing of doing so in the dark.  There are literally things crawling and snarling and waiting to EAT US, right outside of our front door. And GONE are the days when I would take the Franks out the backyard door and have her do her thing out there without a leash.  Now, she's lucky I take her out without a doggie flak jacket.  (What is the plate-carrying capacity of a 20-lb dog?  I'm looking for actual answers here; thanks.)

As for the garden (garter?  I still haven't worked this one out) snakes, one neighbor assures me that they're not dangerous.  Oh, sure -- maybe they're not immediately dangerous, but when you consider the lethal consequences, in the form of the years sure to be shaved off the end of my life by encountering a gar....[mumbles something] snake now, I'd say that's dangerous enough.

The more I talk to the neighbors, the more crazy, scary animals I hear about.  I'm debating just not talking to people anymore.

Part of me also wonders if maybe they're playing a big practical joke on me -- you know, team up to haze the new(ish) girl?  Or something?  I didn't believe Jason when he told me about the bald eagles when we first moved in; it was only after our nearest neighbor told me that I started to believe it might be true, and it wasn't until one of them did a low fly-by of my car as I drove up the street that I truly believed they lived here.  (It was an amazing sight, btw; a less amazing photo from this evening appears below.)



But I'm really skeptical now, partly because I don't want to believe we live basically inside of a giant zoo enclosure, but also because it's starting to sound outlandish: foxes.  Bobcat.  Coyote.  I refuse to believe it.

The minute I hear we have a honeybadger, I'm calling bullsh*t...

...from inside the house.  Why tempt fate?

1 comment:

  1. I egret to inform you...

    ...that the bird in the photo, according to my Husband, who knows these things, appears to be an egret. My response to this new information is to point out that I am from Brooklyn. (This is my excuse for a lot of things; being blonde is my back-up excuse.) In addition to the standard baseball team birds (as noted above), we basically lump birds into two groups: pigeons, and non-pigeons.

    The bird in the photo is, therefore -- ornithologically (it's totally a word) speaking -- a non-pigeon.

    Thank you.

    ReplyDelete

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